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12 Strategies to Improve Low Self Esteem

What is a Low Self Esteem?

Self-esteem is our opinion about ourselves. Healthy self-esteem makes us feel positive about ourselves and towards life. Because of this, we tend to deal with life's ups and downs in a better way. Low self-esteem is when we treat ourselves and life in a more negative and critical way.

Self-esteem is important as it has effects on our choices and decisions. It is an acknowledgement of self-worth and self-respect. It is the flow of feelings of worthiness or unworthiness that we experience during an event.

Low self-esteem isn't a mental health disorder itself but it is closely linked to mental problems.


low self esteem

Low Self-Esteem Symptoms:

The following are the 8 symptoms of low self-esteem to keep an eye out for:
  • Struggle in speaking up about their own needs, wants, and feelings, especially with what others want or need.
  • Feeling guilty for daily kinds of stuff that is not in control or responsible for them.
  • Follow the crowd and hesitation in following your own thoughts and feelings.
  • Having a feeling of not deserving of or capable of something. This could lead to poor relationships and low-paid jobs.
  • Difficulty in decision-making.
  • Negative self-perspective and thinking people won't like you as who you are.
  • Buying excessive gifts for others so as to be needed or wanted by others.
  • Lack of boundaries invites a lack of respect.

Causes of Low Self-Esteem:

  • Low self-esteem often starts developing in childhood. We absorb positive or negative impressions about ourselves from our friends, teachers, parents, siblings, and even from social media. The negative impression or message about ourselves, unfortunately, stays with us. 
  • Arduous life situations like bereavement or serious maladies can lower self-esteem.
  • Personality type can also be a cause of low self-esteem as some people brood over bad more than others.
  • Poor school performance or unrealistic life goals.
  • Depression or anxiety. Sometimes people are unaware of their symptoms so read the post, 'Depression and Anxiety: Causes, Symptoms, Treatment'.
  • Being lonely for a long time.
  • Being bullied at school.
  • Ongoing medical issues.
  • Body image because of social media and current lifestyle.

Strategies to Improve Low Self-Esteem:

There are some strategies that help in building self-esteem. Work on the following tips to improve low self-esteem:

1. Live in the Moment (Mindfulness):

Living in the moment is the best thing one can do in building self-esteem. Stocking up a pile of emotion from past hurts or future worries badly affect self-esteem. 

Mindfulness helps you to enjoy the moments you are living in and this would aid in making the right decision wisely and consciously.

Letting go of past hurts and future worries enables us to live in the present and this improves low self-esteem. Mindfulness assists in curbing people-pleasing attitudes by stopping autopilot thinking.

Mindfulness is key to knowing how to live life actively at its fullest by becoming aware of thoughts and assertiveness in making decisions.

2. Build Positive Relationships:

Building negative relationships is one of the prime causes of low self-esteem. Make less contact with people who bring you down as it hits your self-esteem badly. Also, express how you feel about their rude words and actions. 

Start avoiding toxic people and this opens the path to meeting positive ones that encourage you and appreciate you. Don't stay in relationships that need pleasing all the time and even after trying to fulfil their expectations they don't seem satisfied.

3. Acknowledge What You are Good at:

Everybody is good at doing something like painting, organising, cooking, etc. Try to do things that you are good at as this helps in lifting the mood and makes you feel better. 

When you love to do something and invest energy in this then definitely you give your best and can get successful by following your enthusiasm. 

4. Be Good to Yourself:

This is true that sometimes we get too harsh on ourselves, especially when feeling like being self-critical. Keep in mind that not all self-criticism is harmful but actually some are extremely beneficial. For example, when not pursuing perfectionism as it helps in building self-confidence, and this aids in learning from mistakes.

Keep yourself in the shoes of your friend and then think about what advice you would give if your friend went through a similar situation. We give better advice to others so it's an easy tip to get better advice for yourself.

5. Start saying 'No':

There is nothing bad in saying 'no' by conveying messages in a different way until other people understand it. In fact, it helps in creating healthy boundaries and it will also not create trouble in relationships.

Saying 'yes' all the type to please others gives you a burden, stress, and especially low self-esteem when can't meet the expectations.

6. Don't be Scruffy:

Don't be scruffy in front of others. Your dress and style matter a lot to feel good and this encourages you to be confident among others while speaking or dealing with them. Don't show yourself nervous in front of others even if you are. 

When you dress well, you feel good and this can help in facilitating the conversation. Apparently, dressing properly, having a nice haircut, and having well-done makeup show a higher self-confidence. When you don't give time to self-care or self-appearance then it starts gradually affecting your self-esteem.

7. Don't Copy:

Don't try to copy anyone or never change your originality because it is the best thing you have. Sometimes using less formal language helps you to feel comfortable and confident. Loving your true self can bring miracles in your life.

According to Suzy Kassem, 'Stay true to yourself. An original is worth more than a copy.

8. Be Contented:

If you are contented with what you have then it makes you feel confident and it doesn't necessary that you are perfect, if you feel contented then you naturally look amazing. 

Appreciating the blessings in life and letting go of bad memories make life peaceful and contented.

9. Learn to be Self-Assertive:

Assertiveness is the quality of having self-confidence and self-assurance without being rude or aggressive. It is to respect other opinions and needs and expect the same in return. 

You can also monitor self-assertive people and look for their ways of handling situations. It won't be copying them but learning from their tips and inklings.

10. Don't Hesitate to Trying New Things: 

Often low self-esteem hinders them from trying new things. It is common to feel afraid or nervous when doing something new for the first time but these things won't stop anyone with healthy self-esteem to try and take on new challenges in life.

Set realistic goals and then work on achieving them. These achievements also help in building self-esteem. 

11. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy:

Cognitive-Behaviour therapy is a psycho-social demonstration of interceding to improve emotional wellness. For managing everyday stress it's imperative to feel certain and have discretion. This conduct helps in taking care of unpleasant circumstances with less distress.

Low self-esteem can be linked to anxiety and depression. CBT sessions help people with low self-esteem by aiming to figure out inefficient thinking patterns. To know more about this, read the post, 'CBT Treatment for Low Confidence'.

Both NHS or Private healthcare for employees covers Mental healthcare plans. It costs around £150 -£400 for initial consultation or assessments. It may be covered by insurance or will be free of cost on NHS. Also, you can talk to a therapist online anonymously or choose betterhelp online counseling or a service of your choice.

12. Manage a Journal:

Maintaining a journal helps in getting aware of negative and positive thought patterns. Sometimes thoughts and feelings are locked in the subconscious and writing about how you are feeling makes you aware of thoughts that are responsible for generating those feelings. In this way, you can act more consciously towards the cause of negative emotions. 

Low confidence might be caused by unsupportive people around us when we were growing up but remember we can grow and develop confidence at any age.

Charity List UK:

There are a number of organisations that provide help and support. These include UK carers, children carers, support groups, the national society for autism, charities in UK, mind UK, UK helpline, mental health support, health charities UK,  charities that support mental health, disability support groups UK, social anxiety support groups online, depression support groups UK and so on. 

Check the website Self Help UK for a list of charity organisations and their contact details.


Did I Miss Anything? 

Now I'd like to hear from you:
What strategies from today's post you are going to try first?
or maybe I didn't mention one of your favourite tips.
Either way, let me know by leaving a comment below right now.
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Location: England

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